Oscars 2019

Last year might’ve not been as tumultuous in Hollywood as the previous, but that doesn’t mean there weren’t some notable events. For instance, Disney officially took possession of 20^th Century Fox, and has since used this unprecedented wealth of material to release a CGI version of the Lion King to take advantage of James Earl Jones sounding slightly older, and to also spray-paint Will Smith blue. Twitter storms abounded, from Kanye West spouting nonsense, to Roseanne, and the frankly irksome firing of James Gunn. Flim-flarnin' Bill Cosby proved what might be a possible look at Kevin Spacey’s future as the gavel banged for him, and an era ended as Stan Lee passed away. And once again, we come to the time when the elite of Tinseltown forget all that and congratulate each other!

Here, let’s take a look at the winners of small naked statuettes and see what I think. Starting off with best actor and actress—namely Rami Malek in Bohemian Rhapsody, and Olivia Colman in The Favourite. I haven’t seen the latter, but I can say that while Rhapsody took some liberties with the history presented, Malek as the indomitable and unsurpassable Freddy Mercury was done spot on. Considering he was representing what some consider one of the greatest rock singers of the 20^th century, and nailed it in the eyes of virtually everyone, while acting with mouth prosthetics, we start with an award definitely well deserved.

Christian Bale in Vice was also a nominee for the same category, but for him went the makeup award. I’ll say they also did a good job of dressing Bale, known for the muscular and handsome Bruce Wayne as well as the alluring Patrick Bateman, as the balding, schlubby creep that was Dick Cheney. So props there for conveying sliminess so aptly! 

"I have all the characteristics of a human being: flesh, blood, skin, hair; but not a single, clear, identifiable emotion, except for greed and disgust."

Visual effects was taken by First Man—a film, which to be honest, excelled at pretty much only that, thanks to Ryan Gosling being as stiff as a board in there. In this category, I sense the first real snubbing of the season—that of the underlooked Annihilation, which may have not had the most polygons in its CGI, but did the most with them, to convey scifi visuals you simply don’t get that often. Still, at least they didn’t give the award to The Predator and its hilarious poorly-rendered Chippendale CGI monsters. Or Tom Hardy’s monster tongue in Venom. Though I can imagine some…certain types liking that one…

Best original screenplay went to Green Book, which I haven’t seen, although the trailers which I saw certainly conveyed just the sort of thing the Academy likes. However, I did see Black Klansman, which took Best Adapted Screenplay, and with it Spike Lee’s first Oscar. Spike Lee’s career has certainly gone up and down, but at least there’s always something to talk about with his film, so this is another one I’m happy with. However, they also should’ve created a separate award for the celluloid-grabbing titans that are Adam Driver’s pectoral muscles, which get you thinking about them even when he’s fully clothed. 

"And this is the scene where a massive object emerges from hyperspace...that'd be you, Adam..."

For the first time in a long while, Disney lost the animated award, and the taker was indeed a worthy one in the form of Into the Spiderverse. Lord and Miller continue to prove their knack for fluid, funny, kinetic, and awesome animation, and in the process gave us a superhero flick that actually stood out from the ever-growing crowd. It also didn’t have Tom Hardy doing Unidentifiable Accent No. 344 (a cross between Romanian and Brooklyn this time, apparently). Though Disney got a token nod with the Animated Short Film, Bao, which came with the so-so Incredibles II. It was a charming and cute enough little thing courtesy of Pixar, not much more to say.

           

Now we start coming to the best picture. Hoo boy. First of all, some people were championing Black Panther for that—and, from my perspective, while it was a fine enough film, I honestly wouldn’t go that far. Sure, it was great for representation, but just on its own merits, I felt it had several flaws I couldn’t overlook. That’s just my point of view, but it did however take the awards for costumes and music—and I’m definitely fine with those. The Afropunk stylings were spot on there, and while Marvel films are usually kind of mediocre with their scores, Black Panther managed to stand out in that area, with an actual memorable leitmotif for the bad guy. Considering also the wazillions it made, I think it’s done fine enough for itself.

But the actual winner was Green Book—like I said, I haven’t seen it, but from the trailers, it did seem rather tailor made for being that sort of Oscar winner that most would soon forget about. Last year’s champion Shape of Water will remain a cult film for a while yet, hopefully, but in this category, I would’ve certainly liked to see Black Klansman take the award. And, here’s another snubbing for me—the excellent Widows, one of 2018’s more underappreciated films, and one I definitely felt the Academy should’ve taken aboard.

So that was the Oscars this year—a mixture of definite winners, and those I feel were a bit predictable, and not necessarily in the best way. I must confess, seeing Del Toro, a cult film hero, get Best Picture for a film about a romance with a slimy river monster may have raised some of my expectations in a different way. Still, there’s next year, and all the scandals, smash hits, and usual nonsense to come out of the coke-fuelled lounges of Hollywood. And may they keep giving idiots like me stuff to write about.